Sunday 21 October 2018

An ugly duckling

She is not pretty to look at
She doesn't have a perfect figure
Stretch marks and cellulite,
she is curved and curved.
She struggles to look at herself,
the reflection is hard to accept
It takes a bigger heart to see the person inside.
She feels ugly, ignored, avoided.
Why, you ask?
You named her ugly duckling,
you called her names,
you told her to cover up and not to show skin
You told her she looks horrible
and the people will be scared to see her.
You told her that your words don't matter but
they do.
They matter.
They stab her heart
While she struggles more to even look at herself.
Her beautiful heart aches
when her appearance stands in the way.
And all you can do is call her an
ugly duckling.

Tuesday 9 October 2018

Unsaid words

Those words going around my heart
thrusting upon its walls
longing to come out.
It aches, it's unfair
when they can't come out.
I try, I really do,
but they are stuck,
aching, inside.
I know they never will come out.
The entire universe resonates with you,
sharing your pain,
the pain which makes you
wanna dance in the rain,
wet and sobby.
The sky is trapped inside you.
It's heavy and wanna rain
but it can't, it won't, it never will.
That bird sings about agony,
The green of the grass reflects you,
The ground is all wet and muddy below you,
The ant is on your shoulder to
console you.
You have never felt more closer to nature,
unsaid words within you,
alive you will feel,
as they die inside
and you will live on.

Sunday 2 September 2018

Keep the light going

She is sitting there,
Near a flickering light.
I am trying to get her out,
to get the immense happiness out.
I want to feel it,
the way it feels when I talk to my imaginary friend
or when a dog wags at me
or when i make my parent smile
or when i fall in love with a character in a book and re-read it
But I can't think straight,
she is trapped, the innocent soul
I talk to people,
Ask for help,
My people try but it's hard to understand.
It's hard to find what's missing.
I get exhausted and hopeless.
I feel I betrayed her, I couldn't help her, the guilt.
All I can do for now
is to keep the light going.

Thursday 30 August 2018

Awed.

I lie on my bed, thinking about you.
My heart so still and fulfilled.
Awed at the joy of your presence.
I don't want to be yours.
I don't want you to be mine.
I don't mind if you are not kind.
When my heart is full, I become so blind.
I love those moments when I melt
and dissolve in your smile,
unable to spit a single word,
all I could do is sit and
stupidly smile.
You make me feel all this
long after you are gone,
when I realised its all magic.
I will not ask more of you,
says my overwhelmed heart,
which is so grateful
to have just met you in this life.